RAD and separation anxiety

My husband and I are celebrating 25 years of marriage on February 11! We are going away on a little trip, just the two of us. We leave Friday and will be gone a week. Taz is not taking it well. He is explosive to put it mildly. He is back to calling me a jerk. I told him I loved him and he said "Shut up." The alarm was pulled off his door this morning so sometime while we were in a deep sleep he got up and binged in the kitchen no doubt. What to do?

Operation Taz goes into effect today. We will be back to the 12 hugs a day. If he doesn't allow it, a pat on the arm, a high five or whatever he will allow. We will write each other notes to read each day while we are gone and then hide his. I'll read his once a day. I will give him a special sweet to put under his pillow for each day. Grandma and Grandpa are coming and they are great with the boys. I'm not worried about that at all.

It is hard to imagine after living with us for 10 of his 13 years that our little boys is this scared. He said "What if your plane is hi jacked?" I told him I had never heard of a plane being hi jacked on the way to a vacation spot. He said "There is a first time for everything." I told him it is something to pray about every day. This fear is so real. It is so deep.

Separation Anxiety

Children with RAD have some major separation anxiety problems. Age doesn't matter here. Whatever they age they go back to the time of their early abandonment. It brings out the fear. When my boys were younger if I even went to the gas station when I came back I'd see the curtain move because they had been standing there watching for me. When they know I am going some where the wildness starts. They haven't adjusted to me going to grad school yet. There is a lot of anxiety on the day or day before I go. I have my last Saturday class of the entire program this Saturday. I am very thankful for that. I do not think mom should quit going places. I do think we need to keep them near us as much as we can. When we are going some place we need to reassure them that we will be back. For a time when our youngest was having some major separation anxiety I would have him think of a nice way to let me know he had been thinking of me. I'd think of a way to let him know I'd been thinking of him. That helped. If it is going to be for very long I'd leave little sweet snacks. I'd tell them as they unwrapped each one to know it was given with love. Once my boys acknowleged I was not going to abandon them they still worried I'd be in a car accident. That is a really big worry to them. I call and check in often even when I am just going to class. We cannot completely stop the fear when we leave. We can do our best to reassure. We must have time to get away and rest, fellowship, date our hubbies or go to grad school!