I am taking a survey on various methods of dealing with rage. At this point I'd like ideas other than holding. I've been going over a blog on holding and I will talk just about that tomorrow. It is important enough to take up about 5 blog posts, I think. Anyway, what are some methods you have of dealing with rages? It is such a serious problem but common with RAD. Here is a suggestion sent in by mom:
"It was amazing when I would get on with my life, how, fast the rages stopped. He was made to pay me, and the entire family's time back for every second his rage took away from peace in the family. We did everything from early bedtime to start (which we all needed anyway) to respite with a fun family outing at the end.
At the end I would drop him and whisper understandingly, empathetically, of his birth mom and it got real deep and personal. He HATED it. I would whisper things into his ear that would truly make him scream. Things about his abandonment that he was holding back, of orphanage life, etc... Enough said? He found other ways to get out his anxiety...I made him not want to rage."
I would like to say that any words we say while they are raging need to be sincere, calm and loving. We should not be sarcastic, yell nor be cruel. Or intent needs to love, make them feel safe and give them what they need. If you have any information about holding of any sort please email me at firstname.lastname@example.org and I may include it tomorrow. Otherwise you can just wait and post tomorrow. I can't wait to hear your ideas.