Siblings with RAD

I am still waiting for permission on the other stories. I think I told you my youngest sons regression was stirred up mainly by jealousy over the time I was spending with our other son who has RAD. So on Friday I took youngest son to Starbucks and sat and played Chinese checkers. He loves their hot chocolate. We had a great time. OTHER son was enraged. He made me pay for spending this time with youngest son all weekend. Tonight is the older sons turn. I assume youngest son will be jealous and make me pay until his turn. Siblings with RAD are very difficult. It is generally considered by most professionals a mistake to put them in the same home. We did not know 2 of our sons had RAD when we adopted our 3 boys. They were a sibling group and came at once. They have a trauma bond. The thing they have most in common is trauma from their past. So they remind each other of the bad things. I keep them apart as much as possible. They are not allowed to play alone together. Not even eat alone together. I do believe they make it harder for each other to heal. Now that I see this pattern developing I will tell them "It is ****'s turn to have time with mom. I understand this is very difficult for you and makes you sad. So when we get home I want you to take it out on me and be angry about it. Then I will take you out for your turn in a couple of days." They will say "NO NO NO I don't do that." And it will probably stop. Make the defiance work for you. It will be interesting to see what happens between them when they are adults.