Monday, January 4, 2010
He got up and went and threw up. I kid you not.
If your hubby still doesn't believe it is going on he needs to speak with someone who knows a great deal about RAD. Record some of what goes on. Wallie World has small recorders and play it back for him. He needs to understand that trinagulation is a part of RAD and this child is fighting for their very survival in their minds.
School is tougher. It seems that some years my child and the teacher did battle all year. It is like kids with RAD have a built in device that knows who they can fool and who they cannot. Other teachers would be completely convinced and feel they needed to be "the one" to stand by this child and save them. Simply tell them how much you appreciate their efforts. Remind them that you love this child with all you have and are getting them all the services you can and that you appreciate their support. As long as the teacher is making their work more simple, expecting less and less and rewarding more and more the child will think they are great. It does the child no favors however as they end the year having not learned all they could have. I don't think there is much you can do about it and I finally just left school issues to school when I could.
Extended family can be really tough because we care so much what they think. Remind them, too, of how much you love this child. Don't ignore the elephant in the room but speak to them privately and let them know they need to trust you. You are the same person they know and love and you need their support now more than ever. Give them as much printed info on RAD as you can. Some people never understand RAD at all.
Don't sacrifice yourself trying to please everyone. You'll lose who you are and in the end they won't all be happy anyway. Focus on your own little family in your own 4 walls. Triangulation is tough but needs to be nipped in the bud immediately by direct discussion. Never, never, never quit!