Friday, September 12, 2008

What can you do?

Here are some things I would like for friends who do not have children with RAD too know.

1. Invite me to go for coffee or lunch. I REALLY need to do fun things.

2. Sometimes I need to unload about the trials of our home. Sometimes I need to talk about other things. I'll let you know which.

3. I enjoy your friendships very much. Most of my life is very good. Just this one part is difficult.

4. Please don't talk to other friends about my child. They do have a right to privacy.

Here are some things I would like for acquaintances to know about RAD.

1. This is not a parenting problem. There is an actual lack of brain development from early trauma. It is also a learned behavior from the very early, possibly prenatal years that goes to the core of their being.

2. My child is not a bad person. They are sick. Please pray for their healing.

3. Do not try to become my child's buddy. He trusts no one. He will use you. It can slow down the healing.

4. Do not tell me "All boys do that." Yes they do but not do it to this extreme, intensity or at this age.

5. I am not strong, I am not a saint. I am just a mom with a sick child trying to find healing.


familygregg said...

Great post. Brenda.

Denise said...

Exactly!!! Would it be okay if I copied and pasted this to my blog for others to see?

Brenda said...


Of course.

ali said...

ohhh the "boys will be boys" mentality of our society.. boy, i could blog about that one! i get the "but hes a boy!" comment all the time. i ignore.

Anonymous said...

I have another one for you, from my life yesterday.....
Please do not defend my child's actions in front of them while I am correcting her! ARGH!
Linda N

Rachelle said...

Good things to know.