Our children were traumatized at a very early age. Here are some websites on how trauma can be treated. Some are on how trauma changes the brain. If you are like me you tend to look for information on Reactive Attachment Disorder. This is good information as well.
http://www.tlcinst.org/ The National Institue for Trauma and Loss in Children
http://www.childtrauma.com/inf.html Child Trauma Institute
http://www.traumaresources.org/ Trauma Resources
http://www.childtrauma.org/ctamaterials/Principles2.asp Child Trauma Academy
http://www.angelfire.com/biz3/news/v1art1.html Helping Children Understand Trauma
It sometimes helps me to remember my children have been traumatized. They suffered horrifically at a very early age through things no adult would want to experience. We must be loving, kind and gentle. It is hard to remember this when I see the angry teen before me. It is true never the less. Have a healing day.
4 comments:
What about the unacceptble behaviors of the present? I am amazed that one of them slashed the chair. They've gotta know better. Are they pushing to see what you will do? How do you remain so calm? Do they get disciplined for the things they do wrong? I thought about you on vacation. My nephews have this, but they are very affectionate. They will go off alone very easily. Poor Tigger was scared of being rejected by her grandpa because of the big stupid mess. We really didn't have any trouble with any of the kids though, it was the stupid grown-ups!
Karean Deborah,
They do have consequences. I think a lot of the chair slashing type behaviors are fear turned to anger that I left them there. We are very structured, quiet and disciplined but loving in our home. I would never be so bold as to say that I always stay calm and never yell. I mess up too.
will you be my mom too? your so sweet.
Sure. I'll be your mom. My kids would differ on the being sweet thing some days.
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